Just Wait...

This morning I decided to stay home and listen to a podcast sermon of David Platt titled, "Questioning God." My parents had called me about a month ago and told me to listen to his sermon from Habakkuk... well, let's just say I can blame God's timing on this one. The book of Habakkuk is all about Habakkuk himself trying to understand why the Lord acts the way he does, leaving him questioning God of His sovereignty. If God is good, then why is there evil in the world? And if there has to be evil, then why do the evil prosper? What is God doing in the world? Habakkuk was a holy man and strived for what is good. He feared God and did what was right, but as life events played out, he saw nothing working out for him and didn't understand why. Habakkuk’s name actually means to “embrace” or “wrestle” and you can see his inward struggle throughout the entire book.

Anyways, all this to say I've been dealing with the same issues lately in my walk with the Lord. I have always tried to make decisions that are God-honoring ever since my walk with the Lord began in high school, of course, dealing with occasional slip ups here and there because I am most definitely a fallen human being. One thing that has really been tough for me is how much time I put into studying for school... yet, I can never seem to achieve the grades I'm striving for and seem to be plagued with averageness. This has been super hard for me recently because here I am a senior graduating soon and still receiving grades that do not show all the hours of sitting over my books reading, highlighting, rereading and rewriting... Really, I have nothing to show for all that time spent studying for that one individual test. To sum it all up, I leave tests thinking that I dominated it, feeling really good about how I did, and then, finally, receiving my test back only to see it dominated me... AGAIN. It's hard to find motivation to complete 17 hrs when this happens pretty much every time.

This week I have a mountain of tests, assignments, and papers to complete.... And the only feeling I feel is defeat. After listening to this sermon this morning, the Lord answered all my "why" questions. Me: "Why didn't you make me smarter?" God: "Because I Am Sovereign." Me: "Why do I put so much time into everything and see zero fruit from all my labor?" God: "Because my plan is Sovereign over your life." Needless to say, my little questioning time didn't last too long because the Lord has this way of slowly humbling you and bringing you to your knees. He, basically, told me, "Just as you trust in Me for your salvation, trust in Me through this time of suffering. Do you not trust in My sovereign provision for your life?" God has power over all things and God is sovereign in all things... He will always be there on His throne and present through every hard trial in your life... There is not one part of creation or event in history that God is not sovereign over so WHY not trust in what He is doing?

Our suffering is temporary, trials are temporary, disease is temporary, hurt, pain, death is all very temporary... but our God is eternal and everything He provides such as life and salvation is all very eternal. TRUST IN THAT.

These verses have become my rock this week and I will choose not to look at the surface of my suffering, but a much deeper aspect of it all. I will choose to wait on His perfect timing to reveal his perfect plan over my life... What a mighty God we serve.

[ Habakkuk 3:17-19 ]

17 Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,

18 yet I will rejoice in the LORD,
I will be joyful in God my Savior.

19 The Sovereign LORD is my strength;
he makes my feet like the feet of a deer,
he enables me to go on the heights.
For the director of music. On my stringed instruments.

"Short-term circumstances provide a poor measurement of the long-term character of God." -David Platt

To say it all, I have never been so encouraged by everyone here at Auburn than this week. Yes, I asked the Lord to give me the endurance to tackle this week because I knew I couldn't do it on my own... but He gave me more than just that. He provided me with incredible friends from the very beginning to be there during times like these. Going into this week I was discouraged, but it being almost the end with one more test and a research paper I haven't even begun to start, I have never been so at peace than right now... SO I just wanted to let you all know that. I am so blessed to be in an environment such as Auburn and I truly love it.